When the World splashes water at you, you Drown

People want to believe that they have it all figured out, but those people are just idiots too scared to let their stupidity show. Me, I'm not one of them, I know I'm an idiot and I'm sure a lot of other people know too. I have absolutely nothing of importance figured out, from what I think is important anyway. At first I thought myself a liar, but I'm not. I'm conflicted. I'm simply struggling with myself and my feelings that I don't think I deserve to express.
I do not have a reason as to why I feel this way, I can only tell how I feel and I already know that no one will like it; and I wont be able to tell everything but I'll try to let enough out. There isn't really a beginning so this will be all jumbled and scrambled. Let's start off with what I don't deserve:
I do not deserve to be happy. I do not deserve to be loved or feel love. I do not deserve life. I do not deserve guidance. I do not deserve to desire. I do not deserve to cry. I do not deserve to care. I do not deserve to be cared for. I do not deserve to know. As I said before, I do not know the reasons for why I feel this way, but this is not only a feeling, these are my beliefs and a person cannot throw away their beliefs...
I know, I KNOW (don't ask me how I know) that I will be alone for the rest of my life; that is why I have decided not to pursue love but rather I have decided to try to change my destiny of having absolutely nothing, only to see if it can be done. Since I don't deserve to want anything, I'll force myself to want something and I'll try to work it into my brain that I have to keep working for it. "I want to be a photojournalist." Mainly because it seems like a simple enough job and it is something that I am okay at. I know that I cannot just do nothing for the rest of my life just because I don't deserve it. I suppose I am trying to change my beliefs, at least a little bit, I will pursue happiness but in a different matter. Rather than happiness with another, I will pursue happiness with myself through a career. Or maybe it's not happiness, but instead to be content. So I will force myself to beat myself, that is the only way. And that is me "changing the world". My world.
I wish I wasn't this way, but at the same time I like the way I am. That could possibly be because I'm just scared. If I'm not this way then I wont be me anymore(and that's definitely true). But the me now is a person that I highly hate. I'm disgusting, I'm a disappointment, I'm ugly, I'm purposeless, I'm stupid, I'm unworthy, and I'm undeserving... I'm not human. I don't believe I am. I believe I have even less worth than an insect, and even then insects have a TON of worth.
I am conflicted with myself all the time. I tend to go against my beliefs, because just for a moment I want to be like everyone else. I want to feel what they feel. I...want to be...happy... But I know that is just a dream that I don't deserve to dream up. So I end up crushing myself. But when I do go against my beliefs, I end up in delusions because I want it to work fast. The only things that work fast are drugs, and not even all the time. It's not fair. I hate my life, I hate myself, I hate what I think, I hate what I believe, I hate that I can't change, I hate that I'm a scaredy-cat, I hate that everyone else has the potential to be happy and to be loved and to love, I hate that I hold people down, I hate that I can't help anyone, I hate wanting people to hate me, I hate wanting people to like me, I hate...hating things...
I don't plan on living long, I don't expect to live very long, I expect God to kill me off a couple years on...And I expect to go to hell and suffer even more...
[Not] The End

Thoughts from Sleeplessness

So, I can't sleep right now. Not meaning there's something keeping me from sleeping, I'm not being threatened or anything like "If you sleep, I'm gonna kill you, bitch." I'm just not sleepy, is all.
Have you notice that humans are kinda stupid? Well, not kinda. They are stupid. Humans are very stupid. When they're young, all they do is complain and wish to grow up just so they can complain about not being able to be young again. I used to have a few friends in Elementary School, but when they got to Middle School they thought they had to change and "grow up". I had a little bit more friends in Middle School, but when they reached High School they thought they had to change and "grow up". They all did it to fit in, to follow an adolescent trend of age, I guess. I had a few friends in High School, but the same trend followed to College.
Now, I have about 2 friends and a few of associates. I like those associates that I have, and I love*cough cough* I really like my friends too. Those associates are otaku mostly. I like otaku, they know exactly who they are and they know what they want to be like or at least they aren't entirely afraid of being what they want to be. Otaku are honest folk, most of them anyway, the ones I know.
People complain about people being phoney and crap, but the people who do actually complain out loud are the biggest "phonies" and it's a bit...annoying(and I know I'm kinda complaining out loud right now...). People think that because they moved up a grade that they have moved up in social status or they have moved up in...I don't know, braininess or something. Just because you get older doesn't mean you become or have to become a completely different person. My name is Justin Carney and I will always be Justin Carney; I will never, NEVER become Justin Connigee or whatever more sophisticated or rich-person last name you can think of that starts with a C.
I wish I had the friends I used to have, I wish I still knew who they were. They were nice and cool people, but people change drastically so now I know 2 people. They are very nice and cool people, I can only hope that they don't change or just get tired of me. I can only hope...and I'm not much of a hoper.

Disposable Trash*

If I could speak words, I wouldn't have a blog that I hardly use. I don't even know what to type because I do not know what to speak because I can't speak. My brain has no thought process as to what is happening inside of my mind. I'm simply at a loss because I am stupid.
I believe my existence is pointless, I cannot tell you why because I cannot even tell myself. I am a negative person, my life experiences have made me this way, society has conditioned me to be this way. I try my best not to dwell on how worthless I am but everything that happens to me keeps leading back to that same conclusion. I cannot tell you why I think that I am worthless because I cannot even tell myself. I know only a little about myself, I try not to figure myself out because that only makes me feel worse. I don't like me, at all. Is a person supposed to have a tolerance for himself? That doesn't sound right to me but that's how I feel.
I have no idea what I'm trying to say or get out onto this blog that I hardly use, I'm just typing aimlessly. I don't understand myself. I have horrible memory for a reason because I don't want to remember. It's become habit to forget things on purpose, now when I forget things it is a mistake. I try my best to keep my mind blank so I'm not affected by anything. The only difference between me and a manikin is that I am living, and I'm hardly even doing that. I'm pathetic. I try not to have a mind, but things come out and I regret most things that I end up doing.
I have many fears and living is one of them. Not existing, but actually living. Change has been thrown out of my vocabulary. Love is in the trash, I do not understand and I cannot comprehend that emotion. Happiness is just a dream that I don't even really dream about.
What exactly am I doing if I am even doing anything at all? Everything I say or do is simply disposable trash. I myself am trash; I am the type of trash that does not become another man's treasure.
Everything in my head is conflicting, I do not believe myself. I hate myself. I do not even trust myself. And what is a person if he does not trust himself? He is not a person at all, he is a doll that follows behind others because there is nothing more that he can do. There is nothing more that he wants to do.
The "real" world is a terrifying place and it frightens me to the point of paranoia. I try to stay in my own little world but even that place scares me, another frightening place of confusion and delusions.
I see so many problems within myself and I will not do anything about it because then I feel I will not be me anymore, but I am nobody now so what could be worse than that? I am trash and I will not change because.... Well, what's the point...?
This could go on forever but it would end up getting repetitive which I'm sure it already is by now. So this is me, wiping my mouth after throwing up a flow of words about nothing onto the internet. Over and out, roger roger.

Now I'm nothing...

I feel as though I have to change because the hair on my head has changed. I can't make the dumb faces I used to make because I'll look more dumb than I did before. My hair made me, and now i'm nothing. I'm nothing but an ordinary kid with a fucking stupid lopsided head. I wish I had been more careful as a kid and protected my head more, but there is no changing the past now. I'm just an ordinary kid with a fucking lopsided head. I look fucking stupid, I am fucking stupid. I'm fucking ugly, I've always been ugly.
It's all that simple, but you probably wouldn't understand. I hate everyone, I hate...me.
Now I'm nothing...

Girls in the class of 2010 that I adored or just couldn't keep from looking at. XDD

This is just a bit creepy, but who cares.

Neelam Abbasi

Michele Ako

Jasmine Bolden

Kellee Brown

Amanda Chidumlong

Dominique Coleman

Latasha Dunston

Briana Haden

Bianca Holland

Danielle Howe

Shante Jenkins

Xzasia Leftwich

Samantha Lewis

Latiyfa McAlpin

Shadae Neptune

Shawdae Paul

Tejada Pratt

Amber Sweet

Shaina Taylor

Kenisha Thomas

Brianna Walker

Shamia Wells

Brae Wilkes

Wait, ugh. Aren't most of these people popular kids? That just makes me more of a loser, doesn't it? Oh well. there's more, but i couldn't find a lot of ppl in the yearbook so eh.

Retarded

So my sanity and stability was questioned today but I'll get to that later. Today was a Toxic Candy party. Sounds dangerous, doesn't it? The party was supposed to start at like 3pm so we tried showing up late but it seemed like we made it there pretty early, 5pm. The party was just starting 2 hours after the start period. Nice, stupid, but it's ok. We sat around, waiting for other people to show up, talking with ourselves. <-Doesn't that sentence seem like we're crazy? We were talking with each other. Lol. Random people showed up, I hugged a couple people. And I think I have a sister now.
After everyone showed up, the games began. People were playing football, sword fighting with Styrofoam things (I told Jellybean how I read a futanari hentai doujin about these girls having serious sword fights with their penis'. lol). The sword fights the kids were having were pretty serious too though, they were doing acrobatics all over the place. People were flying through the sky and everything.
Night began to fall and the "real" games got started, like egg catching and pie eating and all that junk. It was funny. Tanique, John, JB, Mike, and me were just sitting around though talking amongst ourselves and laughing. Shayla was nowhere to be found though, so I went to look for her. She was talking with Kage and some other chic who was some guy's girlfriend. I said hi to all of them, and the chic said hi to me and asked if she knew me. I told her she could get to know me and then everyone was like "Ohhhhhh, no, Justin. Wrong person to flirt with." I was just horribly confused, I hadn't been flirting. Let me tell you, I don't even know how to flirt. I wasn't flirting, I didn't say that though, I just asked why. Then her boyfriend came over and was supposedly gonna beat me up. He told me to walk away or hop a fence or some stupid shit, and I just said ok cuz I didn't fucking feel like dealing with a stupid person. But Shayla wouldn't let me go so I couldn't walk away. The idiot asked me if I was scared, I said no. Why the fuck would I be scared of some guy? All he can do is punch me, and it's no big deal anyway. Kage punched me in my chest, I don't remember why. I guess he was just drunk, he wanted me to hit him back but my arms didn't feel like stressing themselves so I didn't. I just walked away, for some reason he thought I hated him. I get back to everyone else and we get back to talking and laughing. Out of nowhere people are screaming, and Britana(Hostest) is on the ground having a seizure. Tanique and Shayla made jokes about it WHILE she was having it, I just watched as her grandmother helped her. The ambulance came and took her away, I just watched on. "Party's Over!" Everyone left.
I got to Shayla's car and there was Idiot again and Kage. Kage told he loved me, he was definitely drunk cuz I know he doesn't. Idiot asked me if I was retarded, I had a slight urge to kill him. It was nice imagining it, but I withheld. I just glared and spat a bunch of pointless questions at him, I just wanted to leave. Fucking Idiot. He has absolutely no right to question the way my brain works, he called me slow, he said my functioning wasn't right. I will destroy you, Idiot, I will fucking destroy you.
I got in the car and we left.
Fucking Idiot...

=_= ...Boring Post

So, graduation is only three days away. Yay, I'm so close to being officially gone. I hate my school, I hate most of the kids in my school.
Anyway, today was the Senior Farewell Ceremony. Ms. Donaldson, our class adviser, cried way too much. It seemed a little forced to me. The whole thing was kind of annoying. I got to school about 30 minutes early because I got a ride from my mom. Ms. Donaldson told everyone to go to the cafeteria and wait to be escorted to the auditorium. So we all waited, everyone with their friends( I was alone btw; just putting that out there). Ms. D came in and started yelling(with tears in her eyes) at kids for dressing inappropriately. Girls were wearing short shorts - pregnant girls were wearing short shorts. What the hell, right? They looked stupid - boys were in jeans and t-shirts and sneakers. I was wearing sneakers too, I didn't really know we couldn't. But I didn't look bad or anything, I was still dressed formally. After she stopped complaining, we all lined up and walked to the auditorium and into a sauna, that school seriously needs some air conditioning. The place smelled like crap. We took our seats and listened to all the speeches given. They played a slideshow of "life at milford", it was just a bunch of random pictures STOLEN from peoples' facebooks. They stole about 3 of John's pictures and they all had me in them. It was embarrassing, seeing as everyone stopped cheering when my picture came up because no one knows me. "Who's that kid?" Tch. They seriously need to ask permission before putting people's pictures up. After that ended, more speeches were given and more tears. At the end, which wasn't really the end, it just seemed like it was the end, Ms. D preached like she was in church. That part kinda made me happy, it was funny. She could totally be a Reverend in a church in one of those black neighborhoods. I would visit. At the real end of the ceremony, Ms. Reed, the assistant principle, and Mr. Gibson, the principle, gave some final words. But they don't really matter.
Then it ended, I was in a bad mood, I went home, and now I'm gonna watch anime so I can lighten my spirits. Goodbye.

The Frostline

Let me warn you, this will be a long blog since I haven’t updated it in a long time.
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First, let’s talk about CHS OtakuFest. Surprisingly we got there without getting lost, shayla and I. Sadly, I had to pay to get in. She got in for free because she was a panelist for the Lolita Walk Fashion show thingy. So unfair. Lol. No biggie though. The main part of the whole mini-con was its Artist Alley, there were so many amazing people. She kept going up and down the alley like 500 times; I was satisfied going up and down twice. I didn’t have any money so looking at all the art I couldn’t buy kinda made me tired. We saw a concert, the audio sucked booty. We saw an art battle, that was awesome. While we were watching that, some guy wanted a picture of her because she was in Lolita and there was a otakuquest thing going, it was like a treasure hunt and one of the things you had to find was 4 lolita sitting in a row. He went to find 2 more girls while we waiting. The other Lolita he had found, Olivia, was beautiful. She was just like one of those shy anime girls, except she wasn’t plain. She wore glasses, which just added to the beauty. She would cover her mouth with two hands in a prayer-like manner, she hardly said a word and when she did her voice was music to the ears. Maybe I’m exaggerating a bit, but she really was amazing. And the way she ran, oh the way she ran could just bring a smile to any persons face. She was so sweet. Anyway, I gave her a handshake and told her “I really wanna ask you more requests but they’re…uh…very perverted,” she laughed and gave me a hug. I asked her if she had a boyfriend, she said yeah, my requests were pointless after that. I’m not sure why I even asked that, I’m an idiot.
--Skip a bunch of junk. So Kelitah finally came and we all set up for the Lolita fashion show. Kelitah was as cute as always, and the participants were cute also. Being surrounded by cute girls kinda makes me sad – I mean, it makes my eyes happy – because *sigh* whatever. I took picture for kelitah and shayla, I screwed up when the girls were walking the “runway” but I took some more to make up for that.
I haven’t talked about everything, but that’s enough of that. One more thing though, Me and shayla are thinking about starting up an artist circle, or should I say line since its only us. It’s called Black colored Rainbow. BCR for short.
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Next comes 2010 Milford Mill Academy Prom. I skipped school the day of to finish up my summer job application, wash my hair and style it, find my converses and clean them by hand( and I washed my shoe strings by hand), and the to get my after prom clothes picked out. I made a whole To Do list.
Before we were about to leave, and I was putting my tux on Tanique calls me: “Justin, can you take me home? I’m still at my mom’s job and I still have to get dressed.” I said “Sure, no problem, kid!” I’m kidding, I didn’t say that. I was annoyed, she’s always doing something like this, she’s always late, she did the same thing last year, blah blah blah. I got a headache. Prom was off to a bad start before I even got to see my date. Me and my mom picked her up anyway and drove her home and then tossed her out the car. Then I went to shayla’s house. She was…magnificent, in my eyes at least. We took some pictures, I was awkward because I’m an awkward kid. We left and got tanique, took some more pictures. And then we all went to prom. Btw, tanique was john’s date.
We got to prom in one piece, we had a little stop in the hood on our way there. The way the person who was driving us was insane, he didn’t even wear a seatbelt and he texted while he drove, we all thought we were gonna die. But we made it. We went in, said hi to familiar faces throughout the whole night, checked in, waited in line to take pictures for like an hour or something, finally took pictures and then headed to where the music was booming. Before we could enter, I was stopped by Ms. Reed, evil lady. “Young man, we told everyone they could not wear tennis shoes and here you are wearing…these. We’ve already sent kids home because they did not follow the rules. I’m sorry, but I have to ask you to leave. You look stupid.” Can you believe she said I looked stupid? You’re not supposed to say that to a kid, my feelings were actually hurt. Yay. I didn’t actually leave, I improvised. “These are the only shoes I have,” I said. She replied, “I’m sorry, look around all these other kids are following the rules why couldn’t you?” So I improvised some more, “These are the only shoes I have, I couldn’t buy dress shoes.” “why not?” “Because our family’s financial situation isn’t good right now, the tux was expensive already I didn’t want my mom buying shoes and wasting money with that too.” I won, “Ok, I’ll let you in but one of your senior activities has to be taken away.”
I had really wanted to punch her though, I paid like 300 dollars in order to go to prom and I couldn’t wear the shoes I wanted? Fuck that.
So we made it inside, Tanique and shayla ate. I sat and tried to get into happy mode, it took awhile… Ms. Reed really had gotten to me. I tried to calm myself. I did. After shayla finished eating, we went up to dance, john dragged me up there. I’m not really the dancing type or any type for that matter. I swayed, and watched as the people were happy and enjoying themselves. I thought to myself “what am I doing in a place like this? I don’t belong here.” I didn’t see prom as everyone else saw it. Prom wasn’t fun. I wanted to cry, but shayla bumped me and I put on a nice fake smile. John let me borrow his top hat, I put it on and I danced like I wanted to dance. Top hats are magical. I laughed and I started to have fun. Top hats are really magical.
Then came afterprom. Before we actually got there, we went to a hotel to change. After Prom was at Dave&Busters down Arundel Mills. We went inside, I won shayla a plushie doromon, I think that’s his name, out of the crane game thingy. Then shayla, john, and tanique went to get something to eat. After they ate, they went to play games –I’m don’t really play games so I just watched. I was a bad date, I already knew. Shayla looked bored when Darrell went off somewhere and wasn’t playing games with her anymore. I hated myself.
Anyways, after all of that, we saw asher and kieffer and we all went to play some bowling. I actually played that, I have confidence in my bowling. We bowled about 7 times before we got to finish, we were told we need bowling shoes but no one wanted to get any so we all left. We ate some more and then went to win some tickets while shayla slept, she was sleepy. I guess she wasn’t used to staying up til 3 in the morning, or I was too boring. Either one. We tried to win as many tickets as we could before we had to go. Tanique and john had a ton. I had…a little. Lol. We cashed in our tickets and got some prizes. Then it was all over, we left.
Prom was so-so. Afterprom was fun.
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I don’t have a girlfriend anymore.
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THE END.

Void

I'm missing impact, I lack feeling. I was just now accepted into my first choice college, Pennsylvania College of Art & Design, but I don't feel anything. When I was accepted into my second choice, The University of the Arts, I didn't feel anything. It's like after the process of applying was done with, the outcome didn't matter anymore. It was either was or wasn't, and if it was then that would be nice. Yay me... Maybe I wont be happy until I actually go somewhere... Or maybe I'm not happy because I was actually accepted... I'm scared, college is scary. This is like the first time my mother took me to my first grade class and just said she was gonna ditch me, I cried and tried to cling to her. I didn't want to be left alone, but in the end I was and nothing got better. I just cried. College is like a bigger form of that. Instead of leaving me in a classroom to only be coming to pick me up later on, I gonna be dropped off and forgotten, never to be picked up again. And I'll be alone, I'm not good at making friends.But of course, when I get somewhere, I'll just have to deal with it. I have to grow up, I suppose...
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Back to me getting into my first choice. It doesn't really matter if you get into a college if you can't go... I didn't see anything about a scholarship in there(hopefully they send some grants or something later on). But yeah, my mom's choosing my college's on how much money they offer(cuz we're poor), it's understandable. I WANT to go to PCAD, but I can't if they don't offer any money... I WANT to go to PCAD, but I can't if they don't offer any money... I have never been able to go to the school I've wanted to ever since Middle School. I was always rejected, never good enough; this isn't any different really. No money, no go. NO GO, not different at all. There's is no point of acceptance if you can't go, and being accepted and not being able to go is so much harder. Being rejected is easy, you know your worthless. But when your accepted and you just can't go, you get mixed feelings and mixed feelings kill people. I want a solid feeling, I WANT TO GO. I just hope they send some grants or scholarships later. I pray, and I don't even pray.

Public Broadcast of thought...

Why do people feel the need to lie about something that they have obviously done or something that they are obviously doing? Or rather, why can't people admit to their obviousness, that should even be obvious to them? It's like they don't accept themselves or something.
Tanique, you are using John. Accept it. I mean, the meaning of using is to be with someone to gain something from them, and even if that's not the reason that a person is with someone but something is still being gained then the other person is still being used... even unintentionally(at least that's the meaning I came up with to fit the situation. I'm just making this up). And you gain a lot. Accept it. You tell John to do a ton of things. Accept it. John does things for you and you accept those things, same as using(you're still gaining something). ACCEPT IT! Just saying...just saying...
Everyone uses people, EVERYONE does, some do so more roughly than others but the fact doesn't change.
Sooo, uh... this was just a random thought I had in the shower...
Uhh...Nachos? *end broadcast*

Greatest Victory Ever!

I had a college interview with Pennsylvania College of Art and Design. Of course, it was scary at first but it wasn't all as bad as I thought it would be. The lady said I did well at explaining my work, she was talking to me like I had already been accepted. It was nice and fun. She liked a lot of my work. But I don't want to get my hopes up but its hard, I'm having a battle in my mind.
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On second note, not to brag or anything but I'm awesome. Greatest victory ever: 442 episodes finished in 3 weeks. Well, actually 3 weeks and 2 days but who really need the specifics? Its too much to say anyway, so lets just stick with 3 weeks. I am completely in love with One Piece. I can't think of anything but that. Luffy makes me smile, not to sound gay or anything. Robin turns me on. Their adventures make me excited. Maybe because it's a shonen anime, and I am a shonen, that I just can't stop watching it. It's like the anime was made for me, I'm so invovled. Feels like I'm fighting the battles. lol.
Just know that I am an otaku who races through anime. VROOM VROOM.

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On third note, I didn't get to go to the party I wanted to go to. For some reason, John was taking like 5 hours just to get to walgreens, and by the time he would have actually made it and we would have left to go to the party together I would have had to go home. Yay for that fail. I'm a bit upset but I'll get over it. Look at that, I'm over it.
Instead of going to the party, I went over Sydney's house. We talked, laughed, watched tv, we just hung out. We watched some porn and laughed at that. And then I turned on some anime and I laughed at that. Tonight was fine, not bad at all. Though before I went to Sydney's house, some bum-looking guy said to me: "Hey, baby, how you doing?" It was like he was trying to pick me up or something, or maybe he thought I was a hooker. But before all of that, I'M A GUY. G U Y. Goodness... I didn't tell him that though, I just told him: "I'm fine" and went about my business. It was too much to explain that I was simply a pretty little boy.
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On fourth note, Good night~ I tired...

Have you ever wondered...

While you were walking somewhere, have you ever wondered if you were actually awake? While you were walking somewhere, have you ever wondered if you were actually wearing pants? When you arrived at your destination, did you ask yourself: "How the heck did I get here?"
That's how it was for me today. Today was an odd day, it was like time itself slowed down(but I know it didn't, time doesn't get faster or slower if time even moves at all). I went through my day in a daze, bumping into random folk who I couldn't care less about.

I have way too much to do, maybe that's why my brain is all fizzled like root beer. I have to do all these art assignments, I have to finish turning in all my college crap, I have to make my portfolio for these art colleges, I have to do annoying homework, and I have to get ready for prom too. And above all else, I HAVE TO WATCH ANIME! I can't go through a day without watching anime, and when I do watch anime I can't stop so all that stuff that I said I have to do just piles up.

Anime is deadly, don't become an otaku kids. It could ruin your life...or maybe not. I'm not even sure.

Blah blah blah.... Is that all I have to say? I guess. See ya, I'm gonna watch some anime and not do my homework. I'm such an idiot.

Blehgeh

Well, today was a pointless day, just like any other day. But since there was a two hour delay, I got some anime in before I went to school. That made the day less pointless, for the most part.

There really isn't much to say, it was a normal day. Except when I was walking home. This huge group of "niggas" were hanging out the way I walk home and I had to walk around them because the were in the street and there was snow everywhere. So I go to walk around them, not bothering them at all, and then this kid just screams at my face "Ahhhhhhhhhh!" like an idiot. And I jump a bit and glare at them for being idiots. They all laugh and one other kid says "It wooda been funny if ou popped ' im after ou did dat." And then they laughed some more. I have no idea why I jumped, I expected it to happen. It always happens. People are idiots.

Sigh..

Oh I drew a cool picture. It's a janitor lady. I was in gym and thought of the idea after I saw that thing they use to dust floors with. It's not done yet but there you go. Not there you go as you can take it and make it yours though (Don't do that, please.)